This is a question that has been driving the debate for years, and to which no one has been able to provide a definitive answer: is boy-girl friendship possible?
Some say no, that there will always be a physical relationship that will disrupt the harmony of the relationship, when others are convinced that it is entirely possible.
We conducted our investigation by listening to the arguments of both sides, and here we deliver our results. So, boy girl friendship, is it a myth or a reality?
The boy-girl friendship, a heated debate
When we talk about boy-girl friendship, we mean girls and heterosexual boys. Indeed, this friendship obviously exists between two people who are not of the same sex but who have an opposite sexuality. And this reflection makes it possible to quickly understand where the problem number 1 is: sex.
Obviously, when a girl and a boy meet, there will inevitably be a little seduction game that will take place. It is in human nature to want to seduce the opposite sex and we all do it. From the beginning, it is therefore an ambiguous relationship that is created. The girl will play her charm so that the boy is attracted to her, the boy will do his best to make himself interesting, and that is how relationships are formed.
But past this initial course, the links are woven and we really discover each other. And it is often the revelation of the personality of the other that will be decisive! The girl in front of you does not attract you physically, but she makes you laugh, she shares the same absurd ideas as you or the same passions. The boy is cute, but what interests you is his humor, his enthusiasm…
This is how a friendship is formed, regardless of the gender of the person in front! You share good times, without any relationship to sex disturbing this harmony. It’s just pleasure, relaxation, deep discussions. In short, it is a relationship of real friendship that is built.
But then, boy-girl friendship is possible? This is unfortunately not that simple.
The camp of the yes supporters and their arguments
Those who claim that it is possible to build a real girl-boy friendship start from a simple principle: we are not animals. We are therefore quite capable of putting our animal desires aside and seeing the person as something other than a sexual object .
For that, the important thing is that the relation is clear and well defined from the beginning. Despite the few initial mistakes that we play a little, it is necessary that then the two friends do not see in the other the boy or the desirable girl, but a being (almost) asexual with whom to spend good times. It is not necessarily simple, but it cleans up a boy girl relationship.
So, we can wonder if it is possible to make a friendship with a girl who attracted us to the base? With a boy you wanted to seduce initially, and who is not interested? This is where it gets complicated; if the two partners are not on the same wavelength, such a relationship will only lead to frustration and false hope.
We must kill any ambiguity, even if we discuss it clearly with the other. Once it’s done, only the good times will remain and your friendship will certainly be jealous of each other’s companions. But as a sister-sister relationship, your links will be powerful.
Among the advantages of a girl-boy friendship, one finds being able to confide in one’s love problems for example, and to obtain concrete information on the functioning of the opposite sex. Often, this information will fly. Convenient to flirt with another girl, or to understand what’s going on in your boyfriend’s head!
It will be possible to go out, to go to the cinema, to the restaurant, as you would with a friend of the same sex as you, without any problems.
The girl-boy friendship seems conceivable, but some persist in asserting that it is not possible. Let’s look at the arguments they have to make.
The no’s camp and the reasons that make them say it’s impossible
Those who do not believe in boy girl friendship possess several weighty arguments.
The first comes from some studies, which show that men, in their vast majority are not able to dissociate friendship and physical attraction . Most boys will have a certain desire for their friend, and this one remains present in spite of the time that passes. In addition, many of them are convinced that something could happen between them, regardless of whether they are in a relationship or not.
In contrast, girls think of this type of evolution only in the case of celibacy, on the one hand, but above all it is not systematic. They seem perfectly capable of having a man for best friend and going to bang other guys. In addition, girls make a clear distinction between their friends and their potential targets.
Hard to tie a boy-girl friendly relationship?
100% platonic friendship seems hard to grasp for a man. As a result, it can evolve in different directions.
Enter the friend zone
Many skeptics see this as an inevitable outcome. One of them, often the man, develops certain feelings or a form of desire that is not shared by the other. He will hope for more, whereas he is considered only as a friend by the girl he secretly covets.
This is also the case for men who want to seduce a girl, but who do wrong and thus transform a potential sexual partner or love to buddy! Fortunately, there are some tips for getting out of the Friend zone.
But this kind of situation can lead to a painful outcome. You see your friend trying to seduce someone other than you, sleeping with other men, and share with you her adventures. If you are in this situation, boy girl friendship is not possible, since one of the two suffers.
It’s better to explain yourself or take your distance.
The jealousy of couples
Among the factors that can undermine a friendly relationship between a girl and a boy, there is often jealousy that could be the girlfriend or boyfriend of the other . Because for many, a relationship of this type is not possible, doubts will settle, suspicions, and unless you are very clear about the nature of this friendship, it will be a source of problems and failures.
Either the couple will hold at the expense of friendship, or it will be the opposite.
Become a sex-friend
Another potential outcome of a boy-girl friendship is to become partners in sexual games . It is recalled that initially, it is possible that the relationship began on a small game of seduction.
At a party a little watered, during an afternoon to laugh and share, it may be that the situation is slipping. What happens then, if two friends sleep together?
It’s often complicated! At best, it will last a while, but the friendship will not be the same, because you will have passed a cape in the intimacy that do not necessarily cross the true friends. At worst, it will cause new cravings, feelings, jealousy, and the friendly relationship will be simply destroyed.
In short, you will ruin your friendship for an ass story.
To fall in love
Here, anything can happen. Imagine that two best friends who have shared so much realize that they are in love with each other! It’s superb, it’s perfect, and we’re going to a happy ending worthy of the greatest romantic comedies.
On the other hand, if one of the two does not share this love, then we fall back into the Friend zone box, in the best case, or we leave the lives of the other to not have to fight against this love not reciprocal. (If you are a woman, remember to check the attitude of the man in front of you , not to follow a wrong path.)
An evolution that can be as happy as destructive in a boy girl friendship.
Boy-girl friendship, a female utopia?
In the end, we realize that boy girl friendship would be quite possible if men had the same mentality as women! For many of them, it is a relationship that is quite conceivable and logical, since things are clear: a friend is a friend, regardless of gender.
But the male mind is struggling to balance things and many men continue to see in a female body an object of desire, and it does not matter who owns this body: a stranger, a friend, a relative. This is problematic, since it distorts the relationship.
But fortunately, not all men are exactly the same, and some are able to make a difference. This leads to very beautiful girl-boy relationships. We must be aware that having the chance to be truly friends with someone of the opposite sex is not given to everyone, it is a privileged relationship and very rewarding. It allows a man to better understand women, and a woman to decipher the mind of a man with sound advice.
If you get to establish a healthy boy-girl friendship, take care.